Despedida Lunch

On the day before my departure, it was Holy Saturday actually, I begged Mom to agree for a lunch out. Upon much prodding from all of us, she finally said yes. 

We went to Viking's at SM Pampanga. It is an all-you-can-eat restaurant serving international cuisine. I was surprised in a good way coz they infused our Kapampangan dishes in the stream of endless choices.

I love my PH family. We are a tiny unit. Mamang, Cleng, AC, Nia with Mayet and Kakay and our special guest, Auntie Becky!!:)

BFFS forever.

I thank God for all of you.

I am pretty when I am with Mamang.

Mama's Angel- Mayet.

My sister soul and my inaanaks.

I love you all.

As life has taught me, I cherish every moment that I spend with my loved ones. Someday, I will reconnect with all the memories down the lane , always with a smile in my heart knowing that I am loved and I cared back.

Family. Love. Care.

I Miss You All The Time

Every second, minute, hour. Day and night. In gloomy and goofy mood. I miss you so much, it is too heavy inside. I bet in lottery this morning, wishing that despite the hundred thousand odds of winning, I will hit the jackpot so I can instantly fly and go home to you. Until then, I shall continue to try with my every breath to stay sane.

I love you so much, my Mamang. You are more than enough.

Faith. Hope. Courage.

Make-Up, Mitzi and Mamang

I woke at quarter past seven this morning so I could have ample time to apply make up for the 9AM mass in our parish.

I am the only girl in a brood of four but I grew up as "maarte" coz Mamang let me be. As I watched her seated in front of a dresser putting make-up, she allowed me to tinker and try her powder,blush-on, lipstick and I imagined I was an "artista."

There was a phase in my womanhood wherein I simply put baby powder and lip gloss every day. But after a while, my fascination with make up cosmetics blossomed again. Mamang inspired me as I see Mayet dolling her up every morning, rain or shine. It's part of the structured routine in the household. Mom has her big kikay kit at home. 

Just staring at my purses of lipsticks and make up make me happy already. I de-stressed by arranging them, opening each tube of lip shade. When I get overwhelmed with work, I will have my 5-minute break to drink water and apply lipstick , that a vanity mirror was placed inside my locker for a quick make-up sesh.

On a few occasions, back in my PH life, I'd wake in the morning to hear Mamang and Mayet arguing coz Mom's not satisfied with the eyebrow angle Mayet is trying to create.Mom seldom worries about her high blood glucose level and frozen shoulder as she pays attention in checking with her hand-held mirror the pea-sized discoloration she has on her face. She is quite disturbed with it, I think now of buying the Chanel liquid foundation (it's superb) to conceal it.

On my most recent stay in PH, as I  try eyeliner and combine two shades of lipstick, Mamang was beside me, giving comments like, " Yan, bage me ing kule ayan."

Mamang and I share a number of similarities in big and tiny ways as we have a tight and unbreakable bond all these years. Today as the world celebrates Mother's Day, I would like to remember how we both like to be dolled up not to impress but to express and make ourselves feel good. I feel it in my bones her giddiness when she wears make-up as I instantly have my mood perked up too after putting on my Ruby Woo lip color, Physician's Formula eyeliner and my never-to-be-told blush.

Make-up cosmetics fascinate me and Mamang. I know that as long as the both of us continue to wear our red lipstick, life will remain to be colorful and marvelous. As I previously posted on Instagram, "Ma, ako na bahala sa make-up mo." Just stay healthy.

Happy Mother's Day to my most treasured and favorite person in the universe.
I love you, Cor!!!

Happy Mother's Day to all the wonderful mommas out there.

Pretty.Lively.Happy.

Hanging In There

Today marks my 2-year stay here in the state of California, USA. I discovered that next to my natal day and my parents's birthdays, this date would come next as one which I won't forget for the rest of my non-dementia life. Nowadays, we hear "Time flies fast" numerous times, yes it is. However, I sometimes feel like I have been gone too long away from home.  It is the simplest, quiet every day routine that I constantly miss. Waking up on my old bedroom with the sound of tricycles, seeing Mamang, Mayet and Kakay right away with the home cooked breakfast waiting for me. 

I miss my Villa friends, our laugh out loud and coffee sessions with the kids hanging around doing their thing and the boys on the side discussing about sabong, sports, etc. Yet I am thankful that I get to build new camaraderie here from caring people. We do happy hour and able to talk personal matters.

I miss being able to attend eucharistic celebrations at UA chapel everyday, be a lector or commentator and hear inspiring words from Fr. Josel and Fr. Vic. Yet I am thankful for Fr. Richard Vega and my favorite -"Father Teacher Roque for feeding me spiritually to have stronger and steady faith in God.

I miss my work as a clinical instructor, as it kept me abreast with knowledge on the different fields of Nursing, and knowing that in my own little way, I get to impart something of significance to my students. Yet I am thankful I am a nephrology nurse now working at chairside giving direct patient care. Words like, " Thank you Michelle for helping me prolong my life," "Your smile brightens my day", and " Stay sweet to us, " soothe  my back pain and dry hands (from constant hand washing).

I miss Cleng, my best ever friend/niece/shock absorber/ buddy/companion. Yet I am thankful that in spite of the freaking 15- hour time zone difference, we manage to talk and text almost everyday. 

I miss Mamang, my best person in the world. If only I can fly every two weeks, I will. The sadness never goes away, I gather strength and courage each single day to live life without her near me. That some times I literally touch my phone's screen just so I can "touch and kiss" her.  Yet I am very grateful for my Azusa family for their constant help and support in every way they can. Koyang Miller and Ate Reggie are my earth angels, they always have ready solutions for all my problems and worries. Ate Reggie's family treat me like their own. They hear  and feel my anguished cries, finding ways to assure me they have my back.

I miss my old life back in Philippines, the easy and laid back one with its own dose of complexities and worries. Up until now, I still have no clear answer as to "Why do I have to go to USA?'. Yet I am hanging in there, swaying to the wind of uncertainties, clinging on to faith and hope, knowing in my heart that this is an integral part of God's blueprint plan for my journey towards a more beautiful and fruitful life.

Life is never easy, I don't want to make it rough though. I know that  as long as I keep a grateful and appreciative heart, all will be just fine.

Faith. Hope. Courage.

Luau Pictorial with Family

All For Mom

This photo was taken on the night we arrived in Philippines, March 20,2017. We flew via PAL, jet lag notwithstanding, we were all smile and I was extremely glad to see Mamang overwhelmed with joy to see all of us. She was happy to see me of course, but she was happier to see Boo and surprised to have Kong Jay beside her.  I chided her, "Keng susunud, aku ng diling muli. Banta bida ku!!" :)

All for Mom, this picture can not even explain words. And I am grateful.

Family. Care. Love.